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A deep, deep, intense, unconditional love. I forsook all of my friends. I only wanted to be with her and my whole world revolved around her.She said that she loved me and at that time, I believed her but her love was more a love of having a guy to go study with. She loved being engaged, of being a bride and she loved the status of being a married woman. She did not love me but rather, loved having me.We dated for two years, agreeing that we would wait until we were married before having sexual intercourse. I think that was a mistake. We should have had relations, this way I would have gotten to know her better but I was afraid of having a baby out of wedlock and the life of poverty it would have caused.My girlfriend worked for a finance company and she had to work on Friday nights which gave her a two hour dinner time. I always took her out to dinner and sometimes we would have dinner at her parents house.It was four months before our wedding when my fiance was promoted to the. It had my new first name 'Jennifer' but the same last name andbirthdate. I guess I was the woman I would have grown up into if I'd beenborn a girl. I also noticed that the box for sex now had an F in it forfemale. I almost laughed aloud at that, since despite appearances I wasstill a man, a fact that I checked by grabbing my penis which remainedright where it had been my entire life.Mark was right on time and he'd brought me flowers. Well one flower: ared rose with its thorns removed, which he tucked behind my right earafter brushing illusionary hair out of the way. I'm not sure why but Iwanted to feel his hand running through my hair so I willed it to be realand suddenly I felt a weight pulling from my scalp where there never hadbeen one before.He kissed me before we even turned toward his car. I felt a tingle in mylips and realized that I'd accidentally willed my lips and perhaps mywhole face to be those of 'Jen'. We went to a movie that I could remembera single thing about since I.
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